Let’s talk a little bit about chemo and running. After all, I’m totally an expert now after one dose chemo and not even having hung tight until the second dose. Whatever. Anyway, about chemo and running.
It is like running through water. The first few steps of each run I feel amazing. Weightless. Like I am gliding effortlessly along. Then WHAM! Hello wall! I need to read up to understand exactly what I am experiencing here, but basically I seem to go from running easy to the feeling of trudging through a fluid far more viscous than air within a few minutes. I wonder if it has to do with my blood counts? Bio majors, feel free to weigh in!
For those of you who are running or have run while pregnant, it kind of reminds me of the last run that I did during my 34th week; much harder than I think it should be and littered with more walking than I would typically think acceptable.
I am doing my best to maintain perspective and I’m even trying not to get embarrassed when I walk up some of the big hills. [I’m using Kai and Bob as my excuse for needing to walk up hill. P.S. – Chris, Bob needs air in his tires still.] Nevertheless, I can’t help but demand more from myself. I can feel a huge improvement in my energy levels four days out from chemo versus three days out, so maybe the runs will return to the low end of the spectrum of normal runs as I get farther out from the last treatment and my blood counts hopefully approach reasonable levels. Either way, I’ve made it out three out of five days so far, so I at the very least I am collecting a lot of data points to draw conclusions from. For now I guess I just leave my watch home, run my favorite three miles untimed, and act satisfied with the effort.
This running for the sake of running, without regard for pace is such a huge paradigm shift for me that I’m having a lot of trouble coming to terms with it. [You noticed?] I’ll get there, no worries, give me some time.