Useless parents; disgruntled baby

I’m still struggling with daycare. The longer that Kai attends, the more forthcoming they are about how things are going. I appreciate their honesty, but I’m being too sensitive and finding them to be abrasive. Chris is able to be more objective about the situation than I am, so he understands that they are just trying to help when we get notes like this one on her daily report card.
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They were correct, Kai definitely needed her nails trimmed. I feel horrible that daycare had to remind me to trim my child’s nails. The worst part is that I did not even read their note until five days after it was written. Fortunately, her nails had already been trimmed by the time I read it; she came home from daycare one day last week, presumably the day that the note was written, with scratches all over her face. It was at that point that I realized she was due for a trim. Still, I feel like a jerk that it got to the point where they felt that they had to remind me.

Kai, I promise that I will monitor your nails better in the future.

On a probably unrelated note, she has not been all that fond of daycare lately; another thing that I feel guilty about.
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I may have mentioned this before, I’ll risk relaying this story again; I was not a fan of daycare when I was a child either.

When I first left Kai at daycare, I felt horrible about it. Kai and I both cried the first time I dropped her off. As I drove off, I called my mother and asked her what it was like leaving me at daycare. Of course she said that she felt bad about it, but this was the kicker: “I was upset about it at first, but what was most upsetting was when you learned to talk well enough to tell me that you didn’t like going to daycare.”

I’m pretty sure that is in the cards for us as well. Not cool. Luckily (?) Kai has been averaging only three days per week at daycare lately and only attended something like seven days in March. Hopefully her daycare-related trauma is being minimized.

Are all daycares quite this candid?

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7 comments
  1. branny said:

    I’d be pretty hurt by notes like that coming home. Couldn’t they find something redeeming to say also? Sheesh.

  2. jillybean222 said:

    I feel like they are picking on your sweet little baby girl. I would write passive-aggressive notes back to them 😛

  3. Lisa said:

    Oh heavens, I promise you aren’t useless parents! The little notes seem a bit passive-aggressive to me, but I suppose they work well because there are too many kids and parents to remember to tell them all things verbally. I also think Kai is probably fine at daycare. Many children go, and even though you didn’t like it yourself, it didn’t traumatize you or anything. (At least I hope not!!) You are doing your best to be loving parents, and I think that’s the most important. I’m guessing there’s no chance of finding a new daycare…?

  4. Ours is the same way. Don’t let it bug you. I actually appreciate it, as I am completely clueless about some things and need the guidance.

    Em goes between 1-3 days a week depending on my husband’s schedule. I think it’s great. Like when my she started counting her block the other day…. in perfect Spanish!

    Be proud you can afford to send her to an attentive daycare. It’s good for the kids IMO.

    • Brit said:

      That is exactly how Chris seems to look at it. It is best if they clue me in when I am being a space cadet, I don’t want Kai to scratch herself; eventually I’m sure I’ll get the Kai-care checklist down pat.

  5. Bree said:

    I would take those notes to heart, too. I went to daycare until I was old enough to stay home alone. I know things have changed, but I used to liken my day care mom as a “second mom”. I have fond memories of my time there and it helped that some of my good friends were there, too. We will be sending our babies to day car, too. It’s not something I am thrilled about, but its our situation.

    • Brit said:

      I’m sure it will be fine when she gets a bit older. Right now she is very high energy but is unable to entertain herself. When she is mobile enough to keep herself entertained it will be a much better environment for her. 🙂

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